The Traveling Widower

Category: Widower

All posts and pages related to being a widower, and in most cases, how this relates to travel

  • Baja and the Grey Whales – A Really Bad Start

    A person's feet in sneakers visible on a hospital stretcher, with medical equipment and staff in the background.

    Feb 21, 2026

    Note – I wrote most of this on February 22nd, and completed it on the 26th – much has happened in between. This is Part 1 of the Baja trip blog…sorry, you will have to wait for the rest of the story since I’m still working my way back home.

    I left for the first of my major 2026 trips on a beautiful Saturday morning, with high hopes for this long awaited trip. My plan was to drive down I-5 to Valencia (North of LA) on the 21st and stay at a nice hotel, then drive on Sunday to the hotel in San Diego where a van from Baja Jones will pick the group up on the 23rd, and travel to the airport in Ensenada. Great plan. It did not work out quite the way I expected it to. Read on.

    I drove down to Valencia on Saturday since driving all the way to San Diego in one trip is much further than I like to go in one day. I find it difficult now to drive one distance by myself – I miss my co-pilot. It was about a 5.5 hour drive, and I made it in time for happy hour at the hotel. I had a nice dinner at the bar, and two small glasses of beer, and headed back to my room. All good so far. When I was getting ready for bed, I got really dizzy and my heart was pounding. Not good. My heart beat was way over 100, and remained high. I was absolutely panicked and had no idea what to do – I tried to relax, but that did not help, so I eventually called 911. I do have heart related issues – these were classic symptoms of a tachycardia event, so I knew that I needed to have a physician check me out. An ambulance ride was not high on my list for this trip but I had no choice. There is nothing quite like being carted out on a gurney through a hotel lobby to an ambulance. 

    A long story short – they checked me out thoroughly at the ER –  my EKG’s, X-Ray and blood tests were all normal, so there were no indications that I had a heart attack. Always good news. My blood pressure was high, but not at a dangerous level and it had been elevated of late. The doctor said it was probably due to long and short-term stress and dehydration from the drive, and the alcohol and caffeine did not help either.  He recommended that I see my cardiologist soon, and also said I could go ahead with the trip.  

    The best part of this incident is that I got to experience the joy of being all alone in the ER. This facility had most of the patients on beds stationed along the walls and I was lucky enough to be where the police gathered with prisoners who needed medical attention. I got to listen to all the “Bro” talk from the officers, and the endless chatter from the handcuffed detainees. I was not about to tell the police to be quiet, but some poor patient, who was in incredible pain from a passing kidney stone screamed out “Shut Up”. That worked for a while. I’ve heard that passing a stone is the male equivalent of giving birth. I hope never to have that experience. 

    Now I understand why Jan hated going to the hospital,  but at least she had me by her side each time. Having support from a family member or friend really helps while you are lying there, waiting for hours for test results. She was always there for me whenever I did something stupid (rock climbing accident, bicycle accidents, etc.) This was my first time experiencing the ER solo. It sucks.

     I was eventually discharged and made it back to the hotel via UBER around 4:00AM. I was in no rush to leave the next day, so I managed to get a few hours of sleep. I considered briefly just heading home the next morning, but decided that I just needed to relax and stop worrying about the trip ahead. I really did want to see the whales. So, I headed off to San Diego later in the morning – just a 2-3 hour trip, depending on LA traffic. 

    Shortly after I arrived at the hotel, I checked my mail and found some additional, untimely bad news. I had read about the killing of a Mexican cartel lord in the news feeds, and the reprisal gang violence which had spread across Mexico. The owner of Baja Jones (Keith Jones) had sent out an e-mail providing some detail on the impact of our trip, and also included a copy of the State Department warning for a bunch of the Mexican states impacted by the violence. The two Baja states were listed at levels 2 and 3, with the latter suggesting to reconsider travel. Hmmm. 

    U.S. Embassy advisory for U.S. citizens in Mexico regarding safety measures due to security operations in specific states.

    I spent some time reading through the news reports, and to me at least, it appeared that all the violence was centered in the mainland states, not in either of the Baja states. But, there is still risk in going, possibly of being stranded in Mexico for a while. Keith had contacted his transportation companies, and there were no reported incidents in the places we travel through so for now, the trip was still on. One more thing to worry about, and stress was something I was trying to avoid. I had bought some calming gummies (no THC) on the way down and started popping those early on. After thinking this over for a few minutes (I did not have a lot of time, the vans were taking off at 7:00AM), I decided that if we could make it the airport without incident, we would be OK. Guerrero Negro was in an extremely remote part of Baja – not exactly a hot spot for tourism or the drug trade. So, I packed up my duffel bag, checked my pulse (almost normal), put a handful of gummies in my pocket, and headed down to the lobby. The two vans were in the parking lot – time to leave for Ensenada and start the adventure. 

  • Small Changes

    January 23, 2026

    A cozy living room featuring a fireplace with a glass front, a wooden shelf above it with decorative items, and a few duck figurines on the mantel. To the left, there is a modern floor lamp with three light fixtures, and a glass vase with decorative sticks on the right.

    You may be wondering why I’m leading off with a picture of a beautiful fireplace (cough, gag). More on that later. This post has nothing to do with travel, does talk a little bit about photography, but is thankfully not one of those sad stories about grief that occasionally slip out from my journal. And it does reference life as a widower. Being one, it is hard to avoid the obvious. This particular topic is just the outcome of some work I’ve been doing around the house while I’m in between trips. Five weeks to go until I head off on my single engine plane ride to Guerrero Negro and the Grey Whales. GoPro videos of whale eyeballs will soon appear.  

    After I recovered from my endless plane ride home from Antarctica, and knew I was stuck at home for a few months, I started thinking about making a few changes in the house. Jan had wanted to get different bedroom furniture, and was tired of the art work we had in most of the rooms. I agreed of course – we both shared a minimalist view on decorating, and always agreed on whatever we bought for the house (and just about everything else come to think about it). I had ordered a new platform bed for Jan, but it arrived after she passed. My bad. Mea culpa. We had already started converting some of our framed photographs to acrylic prints, and had a few new ones made as well from some of our favorite photos. 

    A coastal landscape featuring large rock formations rising from the ocean, with gentle waves and a pastel sky during sunset.
    Photograph of tall grasses against a blue sky, displayed on a wall.
    Two framed photographs of a coastal sunset, featuring orange and purple hues in the sky, with silhouettes of rocks and trees.
    A coastal landscape photograph featuring sandy beach, tidal pools, and large rock formations under a clear sky.

    These two were our favorites – both were taken when we were visiting friends who have a house in Capitola – Jan and I took a walk along the beach at low tide in the late afternoon,  with our friend and her mutant Golden Retriever. I love the shot of her and our friend walking back towards the village.

    Silhouette of two people walking along a beach at sunset, accompanied by a dog, with cliffs in the background.
    A serene seaside landscape featuring rocky shorelines and a calm ocean under a blue sky with wispy clouds. A dog walks along the water's edge.

    I’ve met some widows/widowers who keep their homes as a memorial for their spouse, refusing to make any changes. I understand that, but that’s not my way. I posted an AI photo on FB the other day, of my house converted to a photo gallery.

    Entrance to a photographic gallery featuring a black door with a sign that reads 'Photographic Gallery Inside', a light fixture, and a crest above the door.

    Obviously that’s not going to happen. For one thing, the HOA in Gold River will never allow that. Plus, I’d have to open up a gift shop. I do have some coffee mugs and t-shirts with my logo, but that’s just too much work, and I’m retired from all variations of that. 

    Sorry, once again, I’m getting off track.

    But, I am transforming the house into a gallery of sorts – I have so many great images from my trips this past year, and having these on the walls keeps my poor brain focused on recent, happier memories, instead of that ugly black hole that follows me around. That’s a good thing. So my office now has acrylic prints from Alaska, Antarctica and Zion National Park, along with existing prints from the Oregon coast. There will soon be one more of a big blue iceberg. 

    Cozy living room corner with a chair, a lamp, and framed nature-themed artwork on the walls.

    I also replaced a small watercolor in the niche in my lounge, with a large acrylic of one of my favorite hummingbird photos – you can get some amazing cropped photos with a 55MPS sensor.

    A close-up photograph of a hummingbird perched on a branch surrounded by vibrant red flowers and lush green foliage.

    The most significant change I’ve made is in the living room (aka the parlor). There were a number of features of this house which we both disliked, aside from the fact that it was two stories –  electric heat (a heat pump), a pool, and laminate floors. Probably a few more things as well – we were desperate for a house. A long story, some other time.  OK…I’m off track again. This particular model of Powell Home had an absurdly small fireplace, in a brick wall. The functional wood burning fireplace was replaced by a useless electric thing which change colors to amuse their grandchildren. And then there was a blank, white, brick wall. We had thought about just ripping it down and starting over, or just covering it with tile, but that was too much work. After staring at it for a while, I figured just breaking up the vast whiteness with something horizontal might help. Like a mantel. Brilliant. The house we had built in Colorado had a beautiful, large fireplace, which came mantel-less. I ordered a 6’, unstained oak mantel, and managed to stain and install it by myself. This one was only 4’, and even with having to drill into bricks, was quite easy to install. Once complete, I was quite pleased with the results (the first photo). I have an acrylic print (see below) on order which will be mounted above the mantel, and will really finish off the room. The gnome will also stay – it fits so well with the decor.

    Close-up of a weathered tree stump with visible moss and textured bark patterns.

    This room had been our hangout before Jan was diagnosed, but I’ve avoided it since she passed. The changes I’ve made sort of wiped the slate clean, and I’m now considering entertaining once again. I need to work on some other spaces now.

    I have one, very large open space in the entry way which is just screaming for a tryptic – that’s a large image, split into three separate prints.

    A high ceiling room featuring a modern chandelier and a colorful painting on the wall. Two closed white doors are visible, with a darkened room in the background.

    I have a few seascape/landscape images from Alaska and Antarctica in mind for that. I’m trying to avoid too many penguin photos….I have so many. It’s also risky filling the house with prints from my most recent trips, since I have six significant adventures coming up in 2026, and another five (so far) in 2027. I’m bound to have something interesting from Iceland, the Northern Lights, Patagonia, or a Kodiak Grizzly Bear devouring someone from my tour group. I’m going to Svalbard in 2027 – encounters with Polar Bears. So many options.

    Maybe I’ll just rotate what’s up on the walls. Or buy a second home on the coast with a lot of big, empty walls. It could happen.

    Peace.